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Hi, folks! Nooby-Doo here, your helper of those most in need and now collector of inventive, wild and weird character names! Mrs. Nosidam is very, very busy and asked me to take over this column. I’ve missed writing my beginners help guides, so this is a real treat! Anyway, on with the name game!

Players Humble Mushroom and Collard Greens should keep their distance from Frederick Choppin, or else they may wind up in Sir Nacho, or perhaps in Supersize Lunchbob.  Quench your thirst with Frappe KosakaKaptain Badinfluence has been hanging out with Mighty Gin, while Crème Fraiche has been spotted in the company of Raspberry Panties.  We can only hope that Potty Cakes is accompanied by Tasty CondimentsSquishy Thefish is most likely Swedish and was wearing red clothing.  Joo’joo Bee sported retro clothes.

Lotus Flower and Iris Foxglove would grace any dungeon party (though they gave yours truly the evil eye) but I’d think twice about Sidhe Devil and Rath Stormfury (who always looks mad!) Methinks Jetfuel Steelbeams belongs on Team Rocket, but Emmy Chocolate & her Free Company DARK are a perfect match.  And when fighting the undead, you definitely want Zombie Proof in your party.

The winner of this issue’s player & mount paring is Chronic Haze and his chocobo, Bong. Until next time, remember, “Do as Doo says, not as Doo does!”

Chaos Theory is a Final Fantasy 14 Free Company on the Hyperion Server. Our mission is to provide a safe, friendly home free of elitism that provides its members a structure in which to participate in all Eorzea has to offer.

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